I have always been a chubby kid and once I became a teenager the chubbiness turned into fat and remained that way.
To be honest, I have no idea what it must feel like to be slim. When people, mostly my mother would tell me to lose weight as it would make me feel good, I always wondered what that meant. I felt happy even when I was fat and not doing anything about it.
In fact, the one joke that still seems to make people laugh is how I was born an underweight child. The doctor infact had mentioned to my mother on one visit the possibility of introducing eggs in my diet so as to ensure I was getting enough proteins. My mother, a staunch vegetarian, didn’t pay any heed to the advice, and I grew well without those eggs. When I went back to meet the doctor a few years later, we moved from that city and hence the few years later, she refused to recognise me and asked my mother what she had fed me.
While it is all nice to laugh about it now, I wish the importance of maintaining good health had struck me earlier on. It would have saved my parents a great many sleepless nights and some good hard earned money as well.
In the last 15 years my parents have tried various means to get me to lose weight and lead a healthy life, other than actually working out for me my mother has done everything. She even enrolled herself in the gym with me in the hope that if I had company I would be regular – she ended up getting fitter and me; I just stayed the way I was.
If there was anything to try I tried it – I enrolled in a state-of-the-art gymnasium and got the best trainer they had and all was well for the first one month, then I got bored – of the trainer and the gym, and the music they played, and the faces I saw there.
I took up yoga – bought great new clothes, felt all good, practised it diligently for two months and then the same thing happened again – BOREDOM.
I even resorted to paying a hefty sum to a very well known weight loss clinic, what happened there you might wonder. I just got all freaked out by the various machines they started attaching to my body parts. Besides being gross on many levels I just hated lying on a stretcher like bed after having paid a lot of money and not being completely sure of whether or not anything positive would come out of it.
Over the last couple of months, I have changed. I am now very particular about what I eat, and ensure that I get my daily dose of exercise. I am now a lot more disciplined, and have been rewarded with a 6 kg loss of weight. I still have a long way to go, but this time I feel I have what it takes to stay the course. So what changed this time? What has made me make these changes to my lifestyle and diet? The answer is my son.
Up until now, my weight and being fit were two different things in my head.
I believed I was fit but fat.
I started feeling unfit when I found myself incapable of keeping pace with my toddler. I would find it difficult to run behind him in the park or just be quick enough to get to him if he had a fall. That scared me.
I was responsible for him and not being confident of taking care of him 100% was something that started making me uncomfortable. This is the one motivation that keeps me going beyond the boredom and monotony that I used to feel earlier.
So, I get into my track pants, slip on my fluorescent shoes and set out for my walk each day. I see the younger girls giggle because they cannot seem to understand why I would be wearing fluorescent coloured shoes, but they make me happy and so I wear them. I overhear another group of young girls comment on how fat I am, I smile at them, and tell myself that I will be fit and walk on.
They are not going to help me take care of my boy in any way.
Why should their opinions about me matter to me in any way? This is my battle and I am ready to take on whoever comes before me.
So bring it on!